Ep 22 – Saying No Is Empowering – Solo with Nat
In this episode, Nat is back with a solo show. She talks about a tough topic that has grown near and dear to her. Using the word No in her business.
Is it even possible to say no without hurting someone’s feelings?
Nat tells a story about being asked to be on a podcast. And the timing just simply didn’t work. She answered with a really understanding message, with gratitude, and a full explanation of how her time is valuable with her boys being very little (2 and 3 yrs old), and being swamped at work. But perhaps another time. The podcasters never responded, and in fact, blocked her from social media.
So, is it even possible to say no without hurting feelings? As long as you always respond with gratitude and respect, that is your only task. It’s in their court if they want to be upset and take it personally. That doesn’t belong to you.
She says that it challenged her worthiness, and bothered her for a split second wondering if she made a mistake. But knowing that when you say yes to something, you are at the very same time saying no to something else. Saying yes to doing this podcast, meant saying no to her family.
Sometimes hearing NO means another YES is often coming down the pipeline
She talks about quoting on many jobs, and sometimes, hearing No this isn’t going to work. Which used to bother her. But now, she has seen a pattern. More often then not, another job comes along that is actually aligned more with her dream client avatar. Had she received a yes from that other client, she wouldn’t have had time for the dream job!!
She tells you “Your priorities matter the most”. Continue to fill yourself up first, and you will have the ability to say no to so much more.
Saying Yes can be resentful
Nat explains a client she recently said yes to. And all she wants to do is cancel. But she’s committed to it. But now she knows, for the future, this type of work does not fill her up. Nat has noted it and will remember down the road to say no. Working with clients you feeling resentful towards does not serve anyone well. Because you are no longer serving with your whole heart and mind.
She tells a story Seth Godin shares about a bakeshop. And how this baker stayed true to herself, said no to a customer, stayed on brand.
Saying No to your industry
Nat and Ang used to be in the wedding industry. But they both needed to start saying no to taking this kind of work. Saying no to weddings meant saying yes to her family again. But also meant saying yes to herself, and her creative being. They no longer have the wedding burn out every summer and fall.
Saying No to Social Media
The scroll is real my friends! Nat touches on how important it is that you limit your time on social media. You can go into your settings and view how long you’re spending each day on social media. But more so, you can also set a daily reminder after 20 minutes, 30 minutes, whatever feels right for you, to notify you when you have set your limit. Spending time on these platforms can grow our business! Absolutely it can. But she and Ang feel very passionate about not spending wasted time on social media that doesn’t move the needle or get your closer to your goals. Watching others on social media meeting their goals does NOT help you get closer to your goals. Yes, engage with your audience. Yes, use Social Media to get your message out. Yes, serve others while on the platforms. But No, do not spend 3 hours scrolling and liking. Say yes to your goals!
Let’s Put This Episode Into Focus:
- Your own approval means more than everything else
- Sometimes saying no means saying yes to your own priorities
- Say No to the business you don’t want
- Stop scrolling past other peoples dreams, and start building your own